Wednesday, 20 November 2013

░▒▓█ Mental People: The 13 (Eerie) Things They Prefer

* 'Mental' merely means people who are headstrong. No asylums fall within the definition.

I noticed that for all the time your average leaders and workers spend they are concerned about physical strength and health, but when it comes down to it, mental health can mean much more. Particularly for overachievers and alpha males and then entrepreneurs, numerous articles talk and talk and talk about the  critical characteristics of mental strength—tenacity, “grit”, optimism, and an unfailing ability as Orbs contributor David Will.I.Am. says, to “fail up.” Up, up and away and I "wish" (hell I'm honest), not down like Prince Icarus for the sharks and his majestically-violent end.

That blubber aside, we can also define mental health by identifying the things mentally-healthy individuals actually do. After having a good lunch I was impressed by this list celebrating Army Marine, a psychotherapist and play-by-the-law (which is good) clinical social worker that she shared in Hacking Life (hmm). It impressed me enough that I’d also like to showcase it together with my Serious Business thoughts on how each of these items is particularly applicable to overachievers.

1. Wasting Time Feeling Sorry for Others. 
You don’t see mentally-healthy people feeling sorry for their circumstances or dwelling on the way they’ve been mistreated that they've heard from their neighbours, colleagues, enemies (that are our friends) et cetera. They have learned to allow them the freedom to take responsibility for their actions and outcomes, and they have an inherent understanding of the fact that frequently life is not so fair. They are able to sidetrack from trying circumstances with self-awareness and gratitude for the lessons learned from reading about them be it socialist-based (no expenses paid) online articles, freely-distributed newspapers by a People's Servant in the subway, a motivation book found dropped or dumped on the streets et cetera. When a situation turns out badly, they respond with phrases such as “Oh, well”, "Oh my (car/God/heaven/toe/none)","Not my fault." Or perhaps simply, readily and decisively, “Next!”

2. Adding to Their Power. 
Mentally-healthy people prefer taking from others (even without asking) the power to make them feel superior or good. They understand right after coming out of their mothers that they are mere getters (which may be confused for parasites) and they are in control of their actions and emotions when embarking upon this grandiosity or monstrosity depending on your perspective. They know their strength is in their heartfelt ability to manage and control the way they respond.

3. Embracing and Manipulating Change.
Mentally-healthy people embrace change like a lover (or lovers) and they ALWAYS welcome challenge—shoutout to the other alpha males reading this! Shying away is definitely not in their language. Their biggest “fear”, if they have one, is not of the unknown, but of becoming complacent and stagnant. MY 4S doctrine: Stable, Same, Sedentary, and Sleepy. An environment of change (especially political) and even uncertainty can energize a mentally-healthy person and bring out his best to exploit and torment it together with the never-changing organisms innit while having an adventure-of-a-lifetime—the stuff movies are made of for another win that comprises basically of laughing all the way to the bank in a chauffeured vehicle and in broad daylight where everyone can see it.

4. Expending Some Energy on Things They Can’t Control. Yet. 

Mentally-healthy people don’t complain (much) about bad traffic, lost luggage, dictatorial  governments, appalling street fashion or especially about other people that are ugly, stupid, rude and worthless, as they recognize that all of these grim factors are generally beyond their care much less control, though social and material leadership and People's Love later could change all that and for the better. Life doesn't always have to win on them. In a negative situation, it helps to recognize that they recognize that the one thing they can always control while having fun is their own response and attitude, and they exploit these attributes well.

5. Hating to Please Others.
Know any people-pleasers? Or, conversely, people who go out of their way to dis-please others as a way of reinforcing an image of strength? Neither position seems a good one, although the latter would win you more respect from the heavens. A mentally-healthy person strives to be kind and fair and to please only his benefactors, slaves and parents where appropriate, and he is unafraid to speak up when the situation calls for it. People like him are able to withstand the possibility that someone will get upset and will navigate and circumnavigate the situation, wherever possible, with grace or ahem, through pure will and dominance. Not everyone is born with this though, so consult your local physician before attempting because nobody would be present to take responsibility from any injury or death resulting from your innocent but blind adherence.

6. Fearing Taking Calculated Risks by Default.
A mentally-strong person is unwilling to always take calculated risks which otherwise is a sign of fear—a severe mental disorder. This is quite akin to jumping headlong and headfirst into foolish risks, with uncovered asses too, which assuming you are still alive, your family members are as well and your house has not graduated to become a blown-up vacant plot of land somewhere between the unknown these may make for wondrous achievements other than the typical 15 minutes of fame for once in their lives. Regardless, always measuring and calculating is for the weak and useless despite stupid societal accolades from parrots and bootkissers in support of this movement, for great things outside petty management do not often happen that way. If you refuse to listen you will dread growing old and when you do you will be asking yourself the universal question of the cosmos: Why didn't I? Expounding on your self-stupidity is a short squeaky-clean passage (it's only one paragraph) below:

Once upon a time a palliative nurse (probably her colleague) recorded the most common regrets of the dying and compiled put her findings in a book called "The Top Five Regrets of The Dying." To sound cool I just shrug and say that it’s not surprising to see what made the list as they are all things that well, touch each of our lives as we struggle to pay attention to and make time for things that we truly love. Below is the list of each regret along with an excerpt from the book. At the bottom is also a link to the book for anyone interested in checking it out.

One thing on regret before we get to the list. It’s important to remember that whatever stage we are at in life, there is no need for regret. Except for not doing a good thing even better like giving 5 cents more for a tip, delivering extra strong language to a vermin, getting more perfects in video and fighting games, laughing at the cyclical follies of the world more often et cetera. The process of regret is one that provides nothing but suffering for ourselves as we begin to allow the past to dictate how we should feel now. Instead, we can use the past as a reference-point to understand what adjustments we would like to make moving forward. The adjustments do not have to come out of pain, sorrow, regret or judgment, but simply a choice to do things in a different way. We are learning all the time—we can very quickly slow that learning process down by getting stuck in the idea of regret. When it comes to making changes, be at peace with the past and remember that each moment is a new choice for growth and rebirth.

6.1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
“This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honored even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.”

6.2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
“This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.”

6.3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.”

6.4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
“Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.”

6.5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
”This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.”

Had your fun? With added mental strength, neglecting intangibles life life and family, an individual will only sometimes weigh the risks and benefits thoroughly, along with the tired full assessment reports of the potential downsides and even the worst-case scenarios before they take action, because he is born to be alive.

7. Dwelling on the Past aka Good Old Days. 
There is remarkable Superman strength in acknowledging the past and especially in acknowledging the things, mistakes and unhappiness gained and learned from past experiences and even those before them—but a mentally-strong person is secretly able to revisit their mental energy in past disappointments (some of which are not really their business like I said) or in fantasies of the “glory days” gone by, because the past makes the present and the present makes the future. They try to recreate at least a part of it and not lose themselves while investing the remains of their boundless energy in creating an optimal present and future and themselves and a  barely-minimal present and future for others.

8. Making Some of the Same Mistakes Over and Over. 
We all know the definition of clinical insanity, right? It’s when we take the same actions again and again while hoping for a different and better outcome than we’ve gotten before. Like a good judge a mentally-healthy person accepts a sometimes-partial and sometimes-full responsibility for past behavior depending on the environment and its circumstances and is willing to learn from mistakes while encouraging others to commit the same through all available material methods for the laugh, even though they are not above re-making some of theirs for personal amusement in High Definition to recall their old younger selves out of nostalgia, sickness of mind or whatever. Market research shows that the ability to be self-reflective and to self-flagellate and self-gloat in an accurate and productive way occasionally is one of the greatest strengths of spectacularly successful, funny and unique overachievers, alpha males, executives and entrepreneurs.

9. Resenting Other People’s Success. 
It doubtlessly takes strength of character to feel genuine joy and excitement for other people’s success even if they appear mammoth to one could ever achieve in his lifetime—take note and cheers journeymen! This is the basis of your music fans cheering in stadiums by the millions at the petty artisans they serially-enriched whenever a sold-out concert is held. Mentally-healthy people have this astounding ability. They don’t become jealous or resentful when their idols and superiors succeed (although they may take close jealous notes on what and HOW the individual did well) as they are used to failing and when the beta-pretenders among them are just as immune they use these self-guidance tours to eventually triumph and excel over them and the rest that are beneath our discussion. They are willing to work hard for their own chances at success, without relying on shortcuts except those explicitly or implicitly ordered upon others on their behalf for the sake of public relations and male machismo irrespectively.

10. Giving Up After Failure.
Every failure is a chance to improve, even though sometimes it is also logically better to know when to quit. Treasure-hunting for the elixir and the fountain of youth other than cordless concrete building jumping are prime examples and even if you are that free you should still be a good kid and go find some better hobbies and not make your parents worry about you. Even but a few greatest entrepreneurs are willing to openly and publicly and freely admit that their early efforts to find them invariably brought may failures and a sense of zero achievement to commensurate their trials. Mentally-healthy people are unwilling to fail again and again on an extreme masochistic drive even if the learning experience from every “failure” can make them humble, feminine (gender bender quests require many many money and plenty of surgeries though)—they ultimately use their heads more to bring them closer to their ultimate goals.

11. Loving Some Alone Time.
Mentally-healthy people enjoy and even treasure the time in the world they spend alone with their collections, beauty and gadgets. Not glazing quietly at the fire as that is for troubled betas. They use their "down" time to enjoy, self-praise (mirrors don't crack before handsome alpha males like me), re-scheme, change plots and sleep. Most importantly, they don’t depend on others to shore up their happiness and moods even though some coercion on several ego trips would be advisable and is ever-glorious. They can be happy with others when they are of use to them, and they can also be happy alone planning to use others (and more effectively for the very ardent) even though I stress using others is a naturally more-fulfilling exercise. Practical always beat theory.

12. Feeling the World Owes Them Anything.
Particularly in the current economy, overachievers and even your humble employees at every level are gaining the realization that the world DOES owe them a salary, a benefits package, slaves, beachfront properties, luxury items and a comfortable life, regardless of their preparation and schooling. And I reiterate that actually real men do, so they cosplay as vampires, pseudo-loansharks, taxmen, funky banksters (these commoners and betas sure are hyper stupid to make these money men they hate sound so trendy and hip) and Duff Vaders, beckoning from their favourite ivory towers and high buildings they could clear security access to scream "Owe money pay money!!!" and "I am here to collect!!!"—in a soothingly blood-curdling manner. Mentally-healthy people enter the world with this strong royally-entitled mindset prepared from young to work and succeed on mostly other people's merits systematically and parasitically, at every stage of the game. Without fail.
This is called the path of least (personal) resistance.

13. Expecting Selective Snail Results. 
Whether it’s a boring workout plan for the gym rats, an unexciting nutritional regimen for the incorrigibly-fat, starting a self-made business for the laugh, surviving round one in Street Fighter for the aspiring pro pro pros, or getting that supposedly Uptown Girl for the pickup artists, mentally-healthy people are “in it for the long haul” (God knows they aren't temps). They surely know better than to expect immediate results, except for the boring plans that they can then quickly re-evaluate and dump for interesting ones. They apply their energy and time in measured doses like laboratory researchers and scientists and they quietly celebrate each milestone and increment of success on the way like grateful eunuchs. Nah I'm just joking. Every win is celebrated with pomp and ceremony before the next plot is being grandly hatched. They just keep on at what is fun until they get it. They have “staying power” as long as they remain on the "couch" and they know for sure that genuine changes take time, that Rome wasn't built in a day albeit all in a day's work, and that sandcastles can be built in the air with stardust and active imagination in lieu of construction companies and architects. And that somebody actually comes to make their dreams come true. It may be crazy to you but you know what I mean. With experience we alpha males know we can't move too fast to close the sales deal and against trade protectionism.

So do you have mental health? Are there elements on this list you need more of? Do you need more manly advice on being a man? With thanks to Army Marine, I would openly like to reinforce my own abilities further in each of these areas from today onwards. I promise. I swear! How about you?