Wednesday, 15 April 2009

░▒▓█ Gender Liberation

I'm now at a friend's place, bored and reading his SPAM mail in great amusement (I didn't bother with his main mail though) while he's sitting next to me studiously reading a, lascivious magazine.
Obviously, it is only natural that someone of his naughty nature would attract lots and lots of naughty spam mails, including that of the enhancement of the biological possibilities of gender liberation (those damn nature-vs-nurture debates never ends). The English used by the enthusiastic marketeers is far from impressive (what can one expect from sleaze cheese anyway) but, their ad titles despite the grade school grammatical errors are "thought-provoking" vocabulary-rich.

Because I'm in such an usually jovial, blue-loving mood today, I shall share my Top Ten list (with corrected English):

#11 - Be the largest pole in the locker room

Commentary: Really cheesy junior high standard remark

#10 - You can really save a lot, I've told you many times

Commentary: Conversational but pretty loserish much

#9  - Rectify your bed issues right here right now
Commentary: (meant as private email for those really unfortunate guys).

#8  - Have women telling their friends about you!

Commentary: Being the center of powder room talk JUST for being a good boy toy - something that guy in mention should be proud of?

#7  - It melts every girl's ice

Commentary: Romantic and ultra Shakespearean (but used in the wrong and pretty shallow context)

#6  - Concentrated carnal power

Commentary: Very extreme and masculine, but also very coarse

#5  - Ingredient of male success
Commentary: Slightly creatively funny

#4  - Spears explain everything
Commentary: More direct and funnier

#3  - Women call my tool a weapon
Commentary: Has a James Bond 007 touch of class, and a slightly more dignified  way to describe a good boy toy ~

#2  - Get Don Juan reputation!
Commentary: Ridiculous and unbelievably childish, which is what makes this line so paradoxically amusing!

And the ALL-TIME #1...

#1  - Stop being a loser in bed
Commentary: ... I just LOLed!!!

Alright, it's been awhile. I'm gonna hit the streets with the boys. You guys be good, do your homework and sleep early! Laters!